If you’re anything like me, you love setting goals for yourself. The feeling of accomplishment after reaching your goal? Uh-mazing. But then it’s 5 minutes later and the accomplishment-high wears off. Time to set a new goal!
What are you really seeking? Behind every goal, there’s a feeling. A desire. The goal is just the pretty dress that desire wears.
It’s time to disrobe and start tapping into the underlying feeling that you’re chasing after.
Let’s say that you have a goal of traveling to Hawaii by the end of the year. Now I’m not saying that you need to get rid of that goal -- Hawaii would be awesome! But if you think that once you get back from your trip, your day-to-day life will be better than it was before the trip, you’re sorely mistaken. The experience of the trip will certainly be great… but that doesn’t mean the trip itself is going to be the secret ingredient to becoming the new, enlightened version of yourself.
So what is the feeling underneath the goal of visiting Hawaii?
Maybe you feel like once you get there, you’ll be able to relax and bask in all the wonderfulness that life has to offer (which you feel like you can’t do in your regular life). You’re seeking a feeling of ease from this trip. Of simplicity. Of calm. You want to find yourself in a slowed down world. A world where your mind is not racing, and your schedule is not bursting at the seams.
And I’m sure your trip to Hawaii will give you exactly those things, temporarily. But in the meantime, how can you get those feelings you’re seeking, while still on home turf?
What things can you do daily to feel how you want to feel?
As an example, let’s focus on the feeling of EASE. If that’s the underlying feeling you’re chasing after, here are some ways you can get it without paying lots of money for a flight and beach front bungalow:
Say no to a social engagement that feels more like an obligation than a good time.
When struggling with a difficult or time-consuming task, pause and ask yourself, “How can I make this easier?”
Declutter your living or work space.
Create meals ahead of time so that you have one less decision to make in your day.
Have a wardrobe that doesn't need dry cleaning, a hairstyle that is easy to manage, and jewelry that doesn’t require 4 assistants to help you put it on.
Clean up your inbox -- enough with the messy, unorganized emails (Oh, and puh-leease start unsubscribing from promo emails you don’t want anymore! Just deleting or moving them to junk won’t cut it. Get rid of them once and for all.)
Limit your online consumption. You’ll find yourself with more time and with a brain that isn’t jumping from tab to tab to tab. To tab. So many open tabs!
Create a night-time ritual that will help you ease into sleep.
Get your meditation on. Start with just 2 minutes a day.
By doing little things daily, you’ll be free to feel how you want to feel … whenever you want to feel it. Goals need not apply.
So now it’s your turn. How do YOU want to feel? And what things can you do to cultivate that feeling on a regular basis?
Because this is your life.
The only one you get.
And you deserve to feel the way you want.